Today I lost it on my kids. Lately, every time I tell them no, they throw this tantrum. It’s mostly loud crying, and while frustrating, I can usually mediate it and move on with my life. We have been working really hard on talking about using our words instead of crying when we are upset about not getting what we want. I thought it was getting better. Clearly, I was mistaken.
Earlier this morning, we went to the eye doctor for the girls to get their yearly check-ups. They were angels. Even when we waited for Jack inside his exam room, they were great. Things started going downhill when I let them try on a pair of glasses when Jack was looking at new ones. Suddenly chaos broke out. Everyone was grabbing for glasses, holding the mirror, and really not listening to a word I was asking. After telling the woman we would come back, we headed to get our things and everyone saw some other kids eating a sucker.
Well, that was it.
Everyone started asking for suckers. I kept saying no because they already got prizes. Chaos ensued.
Suddenly I had two crying girls, a whiney boy who wouldn’t listen, and a bunch of people looking at me with eyes suggesting that I control my children. One woman came up and asked what was wrong, to which I replied that they were unhappy I told them no suckers since crying children do not get treats. I left with two crying girls trailing behind me to the van. I’m proud to say I made it to the van before losing it on them.
The reality of this situation is that sometimes, kids cry. And I can accept that. Even in public. It doesn’t usually bother me. But. It can’t become a regular thing. I’m now looking at ways to help my children express themselves better when they are disappointed. It’s okay to cry when you are sad. But when you just sit there screaming without listening to anyone except yourself, that is a different story.
Moving forward, I’m going to work more on using our feeling words. I’m hoping that might help. I have also been pretty lenient when they do start whining about things, and I think I need to be a little more black and white on things until they understand it’s not okay to throw a tantrum in a store because mommy said ‘no’.
Parenting is hard. And when stressful things are going on in your life, it can be made even harder. I think that was part of the issue today. (Yay for going to school full time!) I apologized to the entire staff and customer base listening to my screaming children today and everyone brushed it off saying they all had kids and not to worry. It’s nice to know that people don’t care. I don’t usually care. But sometimes, we care, and today was one of those days.
It’s important to remember that we all have these days. I know I’m not the only one. And it is a great feeling to know that I’m not the only parent in the world who has screaming children. Sometimes you get compliments on your children and sometimes you get stares. I guess it’s all part of the parenting process. Cheers for being parents!