Today I said goodbye to my little boy as he started his first day of kindergarten. I was very surprised to hear when we registered him that the program was five days a week, all day long. Personally, I can’t say I am 100 percent ready for him to go to school all day every day for the next 15 or so years, but I know that he is excited and ready. So, whether I am ready or not, world, here he comes!
This past week has been very stressful as it really hit me that my little boy is headed to school. He is a very energetic, chatty child who loves running around the house, playing, and helping me out. He loves playing with his sisters and is definitely a dominant personality when they play together. I knew I would miss him being with me every day for most of the day, and it is always exciting but sad to see your child leave the nest.
I thought that I would cry when I dropped him off today, but as I ended up on a wild goose chase to find his teacher and classroom, I was in problem-solving mommy mode and moved away from sentimental and emotional mommy. I have been on the verge of tears all week though.
Okay, full disclosure, a few tears have been shed this week before he went to school. But just sparkling, pretty tears. You know the ones that glisten down your cheek as memories race through your head. Not the ugly cry ones. If I’m being completely honest, they probably weren’t anything like I imagine them being. In fact, they were probably ugly tears too. But, I can pretend they looked like they came from a beautiful actress in a movie. I imagine a woman sitting on a couch as a montage of memories fills the screen while she thinks about how her son is going to school and how much she is going to miss him. Cut to back to the woman and see that glistening tear (singular) as it traces down her face while she smiles about all those good memories and knows that her child is going to be okay. Cut. End Scene. Roll Credits. You’re welcome.
Today, when we got home, the house was pretty quiet. My daughters talk, but not to the extent, frequency, or speed of Jack. There is definitely a different pace that I go with Eva and Marie than when I have Jack around. Both paces are good, but I did miss him. I am looking forward to spending more time with Eva and Marie, as it can be hard to split my time evenly between all three children. With Jack being such a dominant personality, it will be nice to see how Eva and Marie interact without their brother.
Jack ended up having a great day at school, and he is very excited to go back. Eva and Marie start next week, so they are very excited too! It will be very weird having the house to myself for five hours a week! I’m sure I’ll enjoy it though!
While I didn’t cry when I dropped Jack off, I did have my meltdown later on in the evening due to a bunch of things happening at once, one of them being my baby is not a baby anymore. I’m sure I’m not the only one who can handle lots of things until I can’t, and then have my meltdown about everything. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does, its the ugly cry with mascara rubbed all over my face. And my husband’s shirt. I should probably invest in waterproof mascara.
So, moral of this story? I was the mom with lots of tears, and while I was not completely ready for him to go, was very excited for him too. Jack rocked his first day and will rock many more to come.